Tuesday, September 16, 2008

NEWS FLASH ! SARAH PALIN HAS A TANNING BOOTH !


Sarah Palin had a tanning bed installed in the Alaska Governor's mansion ! ! !
She paid for it with her own money ! ! !
What does it all mean ?
Why are we learning this?
Why does ABC News think anyone cares?

LIPSTICK ! PIGS ! REVEREND WRIGHT ! MICHELLE HASN'T BEEN PROUD OF AMERICA ! FLAG PINS ! MUSLIMS ! PREGNANCIES ! DOWNS SYNDROME ! CHARLIE GIBSON ! SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE ! FIRST DUDE ! MCCAIN CAN'T EMAIL ! ARUGULA ! BARRACUDA !

Instead of:

NATIONAL DEBT ! MILITARY BASES OVERSEAS ! SOCIAL SECURITY IS BANKRUPT ! LETS FIND MORE WAYS TO COVER WALL STREET'S GAMBLING LOSSES ! LET'S DO SOMETHING IN IRAQ THAT MAKES SENSE ! INSANE DRUG LAWS ! CROP SUBSIDIES FOR MILLIONAIRES ! IMPORT QUOTAS AND TARIFFS ! GOVERNMENT SPENDING ! WILLIAM AYERS ! THE KEATING FIVE ! TONY REZKO ! MCCAIN-FEINGOLD !

NO, LET'S TALK SARAH PALIN'S FREAKIN' TANNING BOOTH.

I promise you that by this weekend, more Americans will know about The Barracuda Tanning Booth than know about her position on reforming Social Security.

Ok, back to all capital letters:

MCCAIN HAS SEVEN HOUSES ! 5 MILLION DOLLARS IS RICH ! GUNS AND RELIGION ! OBAMA WAS BORN IN HAWAII AND LIVED IN INDONESIA ! TRINITY CHURCH ! A GREEK TEMPLE IN MILE HIGH STADIUM ! HOCKEY MOMS ! PIT BULLS ! A CROSS IN THE DIRT AT THE HANOI HILTON ! SYMBOLS ! METAPHORS ! TALKING POINTS ! SYMBOLS ! SYMBOLS ! SYMBOLS !

i might move to Australia.
update from 12:07 a.m., after surfing the net for about ten minutes....
MOOSE HUNTING ! MOOSE HUNTING ! MOOSE HUNTING !

7 comments:

Alisa said...

ROTFL!!!!!!!

fembuttx said...

ARE HER TITS AND ASS TANNED TOO???

fembuttx said...

THAT MEANS SHE HAS BEEN NAKED IN THE GOVERNORS OFFICE....WOULD SHE THEN GET NAKED IN THE WHITE HOUSE? SHE WOULD NOT BE THE FIRST........I WONDER IF SHE LIKES CIGARS

Anonymous said...

Sarah Palin is connected to Scientology. Here's how:

She has been, and still continues to be, deeply involved with the ultra-right-wing "Dominionist" church movement. READ THIS:

http://markcrispinmiller.blogspot.com/2008/09/sarah-palin-and-cnp.html

The main nexus for the Dominionists is the "Committee on National Policy", which strangely includes non-Christian organizations such as, yes, The Church of Scientology.

The leading "Dominionist" church is MorningStar ministries, which despite being a Christian church, leans heavily on "supernatural" themes and blatantly uses the Scientology Cross in their logo:

http://www.morningstarministries.org/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scientology_cross

fembuttx said...

SO, ARE HER BOOBS TANNED OR NOT? IT SEEMS LIKE IT WOULD BE AGAINST SOME SCIENTOLOGY DOCTRINE TO TAN YOURSELF, MAYBE WE SHOULD ASK TOM CRUISE.

Francis Shivone said...

TWC: There is no end to the damage being done by television's 24 hour news cycle and their need to feed their newsrooms. Marshall McCluhan becomes more of my hero everyday.

(he hypocritically says as he writes this note on his laptop while watching the news)

FCS

fembuttx said...

Mr Sepulchre,

I am greatly disappointed that you did not post anything for me to comment on last night. I expected at least a snide remark about less than tasteful comments on your blog.

So, in retaliation, MONKEY BALLS TITS ASS MOOSE PENIS.

Your friend,

The one the only FEMBUTTX